By STUBASS (152.163.252.68) on Thursday, May 22, 2003 - 01:14 pm:

DEAREST DARLENE: FIRST OF ALL...THIS IS AS DIFFICULT FOR ME AS I'M SURE IT MUST BE FOR YOU!!!...HOWEVER...AFTER LENGTHLY DELIBERATIONS...AS WELL AS A FULL ON "EE-NEE ME-NEE MY-NEE M0"...I HAVE...IN A MOST BENEVELENT AND MOMENTUS DECISION ...DETERMINED THAT "ANGEL" STATUS FOR YOURSELF IS ENTIRELY OUT OF THE QUESTION AT THIS TIME!!!...I SHALL STATE MY REASONS...AND PERHAPS...BE ABLE TO OFFER YOU SEVERAL OPTIONS AT THIS TIME!!!...FIRST OF ALL...WITH A SON ABOUT TO ENTER COLLEGE LIFE...GAINING ADMISSION INTO THE CALIFORNIA STATE UNIVERSITY SYSTEM... FOR AN INDIVIDUAL OF NON-ASIAN DESCENT...IS A NEAR IMPOSSIBLE TASK... AND CERTAINLY A FULL TIME ENDEAVOR!!!...NEXT...IT IS FELT BY THIS OBSERVER...THAT ONE RALPH TERRANA...IS IN DIRE NEED OF ALL THE ATTENTION AND PAMPERING THAT YOU COULD LEND TO HIM AT THIS PIVITOL TIME IN HIS LIFE!!!...TENDING TO RALPHS MANY DESIRES...QUIRKS...PATERNALISTIC NEEDS...AND EGO SUSTAINING NECESSITIES IS MOST CERTAINLY A FULL TIME ENDEAVOUR!!!...NOW...THERE IS *NO* QUESTION THAT YOU MEET ALL THE QUALIFICATIONS FOR "ANGELHOOD"...THOSE BEING PRIMARILY...A MEMBER OF THE FEMALE GENDER...A DESCERNABLE PULSE...YOUR OBVIOUS KNOCKOUT LOOKS AND TALENT...AND AN UNENDING DESIRE FOR THE SUSTAINANCE AND ADVANCEMENT OF ALL THINGS "STUBASS" RELATED!!!...HOWEVER...THERE COMES A TIME IN A MANS LIFE THAT HE MUST COUNT HIS BLESSINGS...AND SACRIFICE CERTAIN IMMEDIATE BENEFITS FOR THE BETTERMENT OF HUMANKIND...AND *I'M* JUST THAT TYPE OF GUY!!!...ALL THAT BEING SAID...THERE ARE CERTAIN ALTERNATIVES FOR ONE SUCH AS YOURSELF...WHICH WOULD ALLOW YOU TO PARTICIPATE IN THE "STUBASS" LEGACY...WHILE NOT BEING TETHERED TO THE VAST RANGE OF RESPONSIBILITIES NECESSARY TO FULFILL YOUR "ANGELIC" OBLIGATIONS!!!...THOSE WOULD INCLUDE...BUT ARE NOT LIMITED TO...PARTICIPATION AND MEMBERSHIP IN AUXILLIARY ORGANIZATIONS LIKE THE "ANGEL ALUMNI ASSOCIATION " *AAA* (NOT TO BE CONFUSED WITH THE GUYS THAT COME OUT AND FIX YOUR FLAT TIRES)!!!...THERE IS ALSO THE "FORMER ANGEL ASSOCIATION" *FAA* (NOT TO BE CONFUSED WITH THE FEDERAL AVIATION ADMINSITRATION)!!!...YOU COULD POSSIBLY FIND TIME TO LEND A HAND TO THE "ANGEL INDOCTRINATION SOCIETY" *AIS* (NOT TO BE CONFUSED WITH THOSE GUYS THAT SELL CHEAP AUTOMOBILE INSURANCE)!!!...OR EVEN THE "DETHRONED ELITE ANGELS" *DEA* (NOT TO BE CONFUSED WITH THE DRUG ENFORCEMENT ADMINISTRATION)...ALTHOUGH I'M HOPING TO KEEP THE ENROLLMENT IN THIS BRANCH TO A BARE MINIMUM!!!...SO SISTER DAR...I HOPE YOU UNDERSTAND ALL THE CONSTERNATION AND SOUL SEARCHING THAT WENT INTO THIS DECISION...AND AS A "FORMER ANGEL IN GOOD STANDING"...YOU ARE STILL MOST CERTAINLY ACCORDED NEARLY EACH AND EVERY BENEFIT ASSOCIATED WITH "FULL ANGEL STATUS"...EXCEPT YOU CAN SKIP THE MEETINGS...AND ARE EXEMPT FROM ANY DUES...FINES...OTHER FEES THAT MAY BE ASSOCIATD WITH FULL MEMBERSHIP!!!...SHOULD YOUR STATUS CHANGE...I WILL KEEP YOUR APPLICATION ON FILE FOR SOME SORT OF FUTURE CONSIDERATION!!!...BEST WISHES AND HANG ON IN THERE!!!...YOUR FORMER "ANGEL DADDY"...STU(WITH A HEAVY HEART)BASS

By KevGo (64.115.26.80) on Thursday, May 22, 2003 - 01:17 pm:

Damn, Stu - you may as well start playing the Manhattans' "Kiss & Say Goodbye"...
Kevin Goins - KevGo

By medusa9e (66.73.12.151) on Thursday, May 22, 2003 - 01:44 pm:

WOW Stu,
Is there an APAI (Angel Pledge Allegiance/or some kind of Initiation) that I don't know about?
I would luv 2 stay within your Heavenly Gates, but I need 2 know what's required of me, B4 I go any further...afterall, I'd hate 2 take that big drop without knowing it's upon me.(U know like Darlene just got)
...I happen 2 like Heavenly things...LMAO!
Is my name still on the roll?
heavenly, heavenly, heavenlyyyy
OK? Stu(Throne Master)bass~~~~~~~~~LOL!

By STUBASS (152.163.252.68) on Thursday, May 22, 2003 - 01:47 pm:

KEV: WITH IDEAS LIKE *THAT*...YOU COULD BE IN LINE FOR THE POSITION OF "PROGRAM DIRECTOR" FOR THE WHOLE "ANGEL" CONGLOMERATE!!!...BY THE WAY DAR...I MEANT TO SAY "MATERNALISTIC" NEEDS OF RALPH!!!...THE OTHER WAY (PATERNALISTIC)...YOU COULD BE SENDING HIM TO HIS ROOM WITHOUT SUPPER...AND TAKING AWAY THE CAR KEYS!!!...BY THE WAY...STUBASS HAS DETERMINED THAT IF ANNIKA MAKES THE CUT AT "THE COLONIAL"...SHE COULD INDEED BE IN LINE FOR A "SPONSORS EXEMPTION" INTO THE STUBASS "ANGELS"!!!...NOW *THAT* WOULD BE COOL!!!...STU(HOPING FOR UNDER PAR)BASS

By STUBASS (152.163.252.68) on Thursday, May 22, 2003 - 01:53 pm:

NOT TO WORRY MEDUSA9E!!!...YOU'RE ON THE ROLL LIKE POPPIES ON A KAISER!!!...AS FOR DAR...SHE IS JUST AT A "CONFUSED" STATE IN HER LIFE AS RELATES TO THE OBLIGATIONS AND RESPONSIBILITIES OF "ANGELHOOD"...AND I JUST FELT THAT I HAD TO GIVE HER SOME SPACE TO SORT THINGS OUT...AND...OF COURSE...HELP RALPH BECOME GROUNDED AGAIN!!!...ALL THIS DARLENE AND "ANGELHOOD" STUFF HAS CERTAINLY BEEN AN OBVIOUS STRAIN ON HIM!!!...SO YOUR IN...SHE'S OUT...NOW ON TO THE NEXT ORDER OF BUSINESS!!!...STU(TCB'N)BASS

By DetroitDar (198.81.26.231) on Thursday, May 22, 2003 - 03:46 pm:

Wow...what kind of "Daddy" kicks an angel when she's down?

By KevGo (64.115.26.80) on Thursday, May 22, 2003 - 06:31 pm:

Yeah, Stu...I can hear it now..."WSTU-FM....Angelic Radio..."
Problem is - someone would expect Mantovani from a station like this.....
Kevin Goins - KevGo

By stephanie (66.54.1.38) on Thursday, May 22, 2003 - 06:50 pm:

oh my God I will never do anything wrong again!!!
Stephanie
A (scared out of her wits) STUBASS angel..

By STUBASS (205.188.209.109) on Thursday, May 22, 2003 - 07:01 pm:

JUS RELAX "ANGELS"!!!...THIS WAS STRICTLY AN INTERNAL MATTER WHICH STUBASS SHOULD HAVE HANDLED OFF LINE (AS NOT TO PETRIFY ANY ANGELS)!!!...IT'S ALL FOR THE BEST...PLUS RALPH HAS PAID A PRETTY PENNY (QUIET AS IT'S KEPT) FOR THE RETURN OF HIS "LADY DAR"...AND WHO IS STUBASS TO REJECT A GOOD BRIBE...ERR...THE OPPORTUNITY TO REUNITE A PAIR SO OBVIOUSLY IN NEED OF EACH OTHER!!!...SO NOT TO WORRY ANGELS...JUST FOLLOW ALL THE "ANGEL" RULES"...STRAIGHTEN UP AND FLY RIGHT...AND YOU'RE ALL SAFE AND SECURE IN THE WORLD OF STUBASS!!!...

By medusa9e (66.73.1.17) on Thursday, May 22, 2003 - 08:21 pm:

well..I think I'd better make sure my gown stays clean, shine my golden slippers, straighten up my Halo, and fluff up my wings...but Thanx 4 giving me the (HSS) Heavenly Security Stamp of approval Stu(This Must B Heaven)bass...LOL!

By STUBASS (152.163.252.68) on Thursday, May 22, 2003 - 08:45 pm:

HEY "ANGEL" MED!!!...I THINK YOU'RE RIGHT!!!...IF THIS AIN'T HEAVEN...THAN WHO NEEDS IT!!!...STU(NO RUFFLED FEATHERS HERE)BASS

By STUBASS (152.163.252.68) on Thursday, May 22, 2003 - 08:54 pm:

HEY KEV: IS THAT "MANTOVANI" SOME SORT OF HIGH PRICED FRENCH WINE OR SOMETHING...SORT OF LIKE MOGAN DAVID OR MANICHEWITZ OR THE LIKE!!!...IF SO...NEVER MIND...IT'S RIPPLE FOR ME ALL THE WAY!!!...STU(GRAPE STOMPER)BASS

By KevGo (64.115.26.80) on Thursday, May 22, 2003 - 08:56 pm:

Stu:
Mantovani is a conductor, dude...Remember those London Records releases?
Kevin Goins -KevGo

By STUBASS (205.188.209.109) on Thursday, May 22, 2003 - 09:03 pm:

OHHHHH: *THAT* MANTOVANI!!!...

By DetroitDar (198.81.26.231) on Thursday, May 22, 2003 - 10:24 pm:

OK Stu: I think you're making a celestial mistake, but I guess the "brotherhood" rules...
"lowly fallen angel Dar"

By STUBASS (152.163.252.68) on Thursday, May 22, 2003 - 11:56 pm:

TOUGH LUCK KID!!!...STUBASS

By DetroitDar (198.81.26.231) on Friday, May 23, 2003 - 12:14 am:

Well I guess I'll get over the intense humiliation of being a Stubass angel reject eventually (LOL)...who knows maybe someone else will pick up my contract!
Back to being "free agent angel applicant Dar"

By stephanie (66.54.1.38) on Friday, May 23, 2003 - 12:36 pm:

Hey Detroit,
I aint goin behind Daddy Stus back but I suggest you check out the Terrible Terrana Twins they will take you in!!! They need help doing some mixes when the air is clear we can take you into our harum and give you some heavenly secrets too!!

Who knows you might be better off being a free agent angel though because no one can control you
...oh Im not being controlled by the way!!!
Stephanie (a must be careful of what I say and do not to upset daddy) STUBASS ANGEL

By stephanie (66.54.1.38) on Friday, May 23, 2003 - 12:38 pm:

Hey Stubass
Did you do well in English? Im sure you were good in English and history!!! You should be a jokewriter or storyteller you cant tell me someone has not picked you up to write for TV what is the scoop/..
Stephanie

By STUBASS (205.188.209.109) on Friday, May 23, 2003 - 12:48 pm:

HEY STEPH: NO ONE AT ALL HAS PICKED ME UP...AND HELL...I'M ONLY ABOUT 145 LBS SOAKING WET!!!...THANKS FOR THE KIND WORDS...WHAT ARE YOU "BUCKING" FOR ANYWAY (YOU'VE ALREADY ATTAINED "ANGEL" STATUS)...WHAT MORE COULD A GIRL WANT???...ENGLISH...HISTORY...RECESS...I WAS GOOD AT ALL OF THEM...EXCEPT MATH (CAN'T HARDLY COUNT ALL MY "ANGELS")!!!...STUBASS

By DetroitDar (198.81.26.231) on Friday, May 23, 2003 - 05:27 pm:

Hey Stephanie: Thanks for the support, but if Angel Daddy doesn't want me I'll just have to deal with it! I'm afraid the "not being controlled thing" will be viewed as a problem by all potential angel daddies. LOL

By STUBASS (205.188.209.109) on Friday, May 23, 2003 - 05:42 pm:

NOW DAR!!!...THERE IS ONLY *ONE* "ANGEL DADDY"!!!...THE REST ARE NOTHING BUT IMPOSTERS...PRETENDERS...AND WANNABEES!!!...IF ANOTHER SHOULD CLAIM TO BE A TRUE "AD"...PLEASE ASK TO SEE THEIR CREDENTIALS...FOR THEY KNOW NOT WHAT THEY SAY!!!...GOOD LUCK...AND REMEMBER..."IT IS BETTER TO HAVE BEEN AN "ANGEL" AND LOST...THEN NEVER TO HAVE BEEN AN "ANGEL" AT ALL!!!...STU(AD)BASS

By DetroitDar (198.81.26.231) on Friday, May 23, 2003 - 05:46 pm:

PS Stu: I gave up on looking for points...but I also enjoy your command of the English language, your knowledge, and sense of humor. It's too bad you cast me aside...Grounded Angel Dar

By STUBASS (152.163.252.68) on Friday, May 23, 2003 - 05:54 pm:

BUT DAR: YOU MAY WISH TO REMAIN ON YOUR POINT SEEKING MISSION...JUST IN CASE...YOU KNOW...SUDDEN "ANGEL" SHORTAGE (YOU DO HAVE SOME EXPERIENCE)...THE PRICE OF WINGS START TO SOAR (YOU SHOULD STILL HAVE YOUR OLD ONES)...OR MUTINY WITHIN THE RANKS (YOU COULD PROBABLY STRAIGHTEN THEM ALL OUT)...PLUS...YOUR KIND WORDS ARE QUITE A BOOST TO MY SHRUNKEN EGO (IF YOU BELIEVE THAT)...SO KEEP IT UP...AND NEVER COUNT YOURSELF TOTALLY OUT!!!...STU(SOMEONES BEEN SENDING ME BAD KARMA)BASS

By DetroitDar (198.81.26.231) on Friday, May 23, 2003 - 07:23 pm:

Sorry Stu but my angel ego is completely intact...no groveling coming your way. However, I'll be easy to find if you reconsider...wingless angels tend to stand out in the crowd!
Detroit(just send it on back)Dar

By douglasm (68.113.13.31) on Friday, May 23, 2003 - 07:25 pm:

Stu...
....if you need a janitor to clean up the fallen angel mess, let me know.
Just don't tell Dora.....

By STUBASS (205.188.209.109) on Friday, May 23, 2003 - 07:27 pm:

DOUG: IT AIN'T LIKE THAT...YOU GOTTA FOLLOW THEM AROUND WITH A LITTLE PLASTIC BAG!!!...STU

By douglasm (68.113.13.31) on Friday, May 23, 2003 - 07:29 pm:

Did that once behind some horses in a parade. I widthdraw my offer.

By DetroitDar (198.81.26.231) on Friday, May 23, 2003 - 07:35 pm:

OUCH!!!